THE REAL CHRISTMAS STORY "Honestly officer , i didn't rob that bank ,my sled isn't stolen,i don't have any cocaine , or any other drugs , and im not hiding a prostitute in my big red bulging coat,you can search me!!!"(officer)"oh yea then what are these pills!?!"(santa)"ummmm......there a male enhancement drug called enzymes"(prostitute hiding in santas coat)"You were using enhancers......son of a bitch!!!!"
(officer)"Hey!!!,what was that?!?!?!?"(santa)"ummm....nothing" damnit were are the elves?,santa thought.(elf swinging in on a rope)"here we are sir!!!!"elf swings into officer and they come down with an "umph!!!!"and a "owwww!! my spleen!!!!"(elf)"santa go on with out me homeboy,i cant help you any longer"(sobs from santa)(santa wispers coldly)"why?!?!?"suddenly santa stands up and pulls out his mac 11(its a gun for all you stupid people)and stands over the cop and says"this is all you're fault pig!!!"santa clicks off the safety"its all you're fault that jimmys dead!!he was the most loyal elf ever, even though he wasn't always on time,his death will be revenged!!!!!!!!!!"bang!bang!bang!bang!,santa unloaded a full mac11 clip (magazine)(30 bullets)
into the cop , and then said "it is done , but jimmy will be forever remembered."jimmy struggles to say"thank you santa you are a real pal"jimmy smiled and drew his last breath , he turned to elf dust as he floted away to heaven(santa)"good bye jimmy"and then santa shouted army style "company ,salute"10 shots rang out from every elf's uzi (another gun, you guys are so stupid)and santa fired 10 shots from his mac 11 and jimmys uzi,but 1 bullet ricoched and killed the prostitute hiding in santas suit,but he didnt notice,for he was so sad about jimmy .then he turned to his remaining alves and said"johnson , you've been promoted"and then he said "lets role boys , our wark here is done"but still he needed more revenge so he butchered up the cop. and each one of the cops family members recieved a body part,...and coal in there stockings.that is when santa became a gangster . and its the REAL christmas storie too.